In June of 2020, I read a story about a missionary that convicted me to live my life in service to the Lord. Since then, I knew that the only thing I could ever do in my life was love God and tell others about Him everywhere I go. As I grew in God’s word, I had an increasing desire to serve abroad, specifically in Latin America.
In my high school years, people began to ask me what it is that I wanted to do after school and the only thing I could say was that I just want to serve God with my life doing whatever He may ask of me. For a while, I thought I would move somewhere overseas as soon as I could; I was so anxious to serve and teach people about God’s word.
In my junior year of high school, I found out about the Institute for GOD (the best college EVER (not biased)), a missions and Bible college in Nashville, TN. The moment I connected with the admissions team I knew that I had to go here.
Going into college I knew there were multiple mission experiences that I was expected to go on in order to get the proper credits for graduation. This was thrilling to me as I could not wait to finally serve abroad which was a calling the Lord had been putting on my heart for many years. This past winter I submitted my application to be on the internship team and I had been counting down the days to go serve since then. Finally, the time to serve had come!
On Friday, June 20th, I was on a plane flying into the country of El Salvador with a full week of service ahead of me. My excitement was palpable; I could not contain the joy of getting to serve the people of El Salvador.
The next day, June 21st, part of my team and I were doing cleaning service project of our GOD campus in El Salvador. Due to the intense rain during this season, water typical sits on the floor of the main bathroom facilities on campus, bringing in dirt and bugs into the showers and toilet areas. My team was tasked with getting the water off the floors and cleaning the bathroom floors/walls for the time that we were on campus.
As I scrubbed the floors on campus, my heart broke knowing that the work I was doing would be undone with the evening rains that day. I almost felt useless seeing all this pain and poverty and yet only being able to offer a temporary cleaning for our friends that live on campus. Later the following week, I was a part of a service project at a slum that was never a space humans were meant to live in. As we walked through and picked up trash, I know that our impact would only go as far as the rain stayed away, which isn’t more than a couple hours during this season in El Salvador. On the drive home, I mourned (what felt to me like) my lack of capacity to do anything sustainable for people that need so much.
I did what I knew to do and I brought it to the Lord and asked what I can do to serve His kids best. I told Him that I felt helpless, like I was not able to do anything significant due to lack of skill, language barriers, and whatever other excuse I could make. Immediately, God reminded me of the decision I made years ago to learn His word at the Institute. I remembered all the times my professors told me that I would never be able to make any lasting difference in the world if I did not first learn God’s word. He reminded me that my lack of capacity in this season of life is not a bad thing; I am a student, I’m not expected to know everything there is to missions, especially when working abroad. I remembered that all God expects of me right now is that I continue to submit my life to Him by taking this time in my life to learn His word with all diligence and commitment.
As I looked to the leaders on my trip, each one of them capable of making great impact in EL Salvador, I was moved by the way each of them had taken many years of their life at some point to learn God’s word. Because they knew the Father, they could help His kids.
All the pain and poverty I encountered this week in El Salvador taught me that God is longing for people to do mission work that know His word. Over and over this week, I was encouraged to go back to school in the fall with even more dedication than I did this past year, putting all I am into learning God’s word so that I can better serve His people. I am learning that the education I am receiving is not for me, it is for the people I get to serve both this summer and for the rest of my life. As I reflected on my education, I thought about how much time it will take to seriously become a student of God’s word.
While I may have multiple years of education ahead of me, it is more than worth it when I remember the faces of the those I have met this week. There is no greater decision I could make than choosing to spend my life learning God’s word and how to serve His people more. I trust as I give my life over to Him in this season that He will grow my capacity to serve and one day I will go back to Latin America and be able to do more than just cleaning bathroom floors. For now, I am learning to be content with being a student and sitting at Jesus’ feet learning from Him.